Huw's winter blog No7 - Looking Good

[huw williams]

We all know how important it is to look good when out on the bike right? Don’t deny it; just take a look around you next time your out on the club run. Notice how much time and money has been spent on kit and equipment that looks fantastic? It’s a lot. But I never fully realized just HOW important until I recently read on some cycling forum or other the following on the subject of whether cyclists should wear make-up or not. No, really.

Someone called Niaps wrote; “Just wondering what you think about wearing make-up & cycling. Is it a no-no, or a little bit is ok? I'm talking a light foundation, lip-gloss, mascara, nothing heavy. I do wear a bit but only because I have imperfect, uneven skin tone which looks even worse after a sweaty ride if I don't cover up a bit. Does wearing make-up make you look like a "non-serious" cyclist, or hopefully, no one really cares?”

Riders evaluating the condition of their opponents when quickly glancing across at them on the climbs has decided the outcome of various classic Tour stages. To think that every time Lance Armstrong attacked Jan Ulrich and went on to win the tour, the copiously rotund German might have avoided inglorious runner-upmanship by the simple application of a light foundation base with a touch of mascara to mask his discomfort, thereby dissuading Armstrong from attacking, and taking the race into the final time trial where the much heavier application of a ‘T-Mobile pink’ lippy so put the fear of God into the Texan and all other competitors that Ulrich reigned supreme.

Not a pretty image is it, Ulrich in make up? I’d never considered what my skin tone might look like on a hard ride until I read this. The implications for the club run are enormous. Are we soon to see Toks looking so good in a delicate No7 Eye Kohl Palette that no-one dare respond to his attacks up the Merstham drag? Marek breaking away over the top of Rusper with a Clarins, Santal-Oil facial of such quality that no one dare attempt to chase him down. Or how about AJ finally attaining his 3rd cat license by the simple application of some Revlon Colourstay eyelash tint?

I always suspected that Richard Viney’s fantastic season was down to the fact that he scrubbed-up with an Estee Lauder Crème Moussant in the village hall before every time trial. The opposition was beaten before they’d been pushed off!

Back on the aforementioned forum, and after a lengthy discussion on the relative merits of Loreal vs Estee Lauder while in the saddle, someone called Mellic replied…
“LOL, can the forum get any more pathetic? Honestly I am tired of all these stupid questions about what deodorant to use, what leg shaving product to use etc. And now a question about make-up! Hello..... How many athletes do you see training/competing in make-up? I really have to wonder why some of you bother in the first place. It seems as though you are more concerned about what you look like on the bike rather than other important aspects of the sport.”

Well duh! Of course we are. Winning races or whipping the other members of the club like rented mules up Box Hill is within the reach of only a select few, i.e. those who have the ability and do the training. The rest of us have to content ourselves with at least trying to look the part.
Me? I’m off to Boots.

[Dominic]

No, No and No. Shaving my legs is enough. Anyway, I haven't got enough money to spend on bikes without worrying about a makeup bill

My wife has told me that the Boots points scheme is very good and their make-up reasonable quality

[Marek]

Anyone tried the tanning moisturiser for their legs, if so is it any good, what sort of shade do you go and does it streak in the rain?

Cheers

Marek..

[Andrew G]

Stop it, you'll scare people off the club run!

[Stu Merckx Man]

i could do with some tanning stuff for my legs, my sister uses the sun silk stuff, its water proof and leaves you with a 'healthy natural glow'

only draw back is if you stop using it abruptly then you get flakey skin

[Marek]

Stu, maybe you should put some on your face as well, the sun silk may stop all those speckly bits of mud sticking to your face making you look like an acne ridden Adrian Mole character.

Cheers

Marek...

[Stu Merckx Man]

its so annoying, i always seem to get it worse than other people...i think im at the (im)perfect hieght or something.

oh and correction on the name of the tanning stuff my sister just informed me sunsilk is shampoo, she uses ''Jergens Natural Glow Daily''

all the info with some stunning results ! http://www.theimpulsivebuy.com/wordpres ... ural-glow/

you can't buy it fromt there, thats just a review thing.

stu

PS this post is my 1% of the total posts

[huw williams]

Blimey - that's raised a few (tinted) eyebrows

[adrian]

Maybe it's just me, but I don't see the problem with the leg on the right. The other one looks jaundiced and its owner has had to rub dodgy toxic and carcinogenic chemicals on it to make it look like that. Madness, madness - I call it madness

[Stu Merckx Man]

i agree adrian, he had a decent tan allready.

but my legs are a hazard to other road users. if even momenterily the sun hits them it creates an awful glare that can cause cars to crash for miles around. likewise if you are a cyclist behind me you can't look down because its too bright, and you hit all the pot holes!

[richv]

[quote]Anyone tried the tanning moisturiser for their legs, if so is it any good, what sort of shade do you go and does it streak in the rain?

Cheers

Marek..

[siwickm]

True, the vaseline tip works, Steve Cave gave me the advice at the beginning of the season and it does seem to work.

So its Nivea lotion all around then, have to put it on my christmas list, or I could just buy it for the wife and use it when she is not looking.

Cheers

Marek....

[Stu Merckx Man]

what does the vaseline do?

[siwickm]

It stops the sweat from running down onto your glasses or into your eyes. Basically the sweat should dribble down the vaseline to the sides of your face, leaving a clear set of lenses.

Of course you could just rub it into your eyebrows to give you that sheen look.

Cheers

Marek....

[Stu Merckx Man]

sean i ment in the innocent sense