CR off-road report & A-Z slang 18-10-08

[Marky Mark]

[img]http://i35.tinypic.com/2604q2u.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i36.tinypic.com/2q903lu.jpg[/img]

Your impression in 'slow motion' of a man falling off a bar stool thats had too many drinks has to be one of the most funniest things I've ever seen, You should be in the circus Alex, I'm so glad you didn't get hurt, it gave us a free reign to laugh then. High five for Alex landing on his head without getting his shoulders muddy, I'm still

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Hard Dude off-road slang for us softie road riders.................

ANDLEBARS
Things connected to you eadset

BLA BLA
Marco Started talking when we left CSS and did stop when the ride was finished, happy days Marco.

COCK
Marco will point it out to you as it was a fine specimen

DOWNHILL
So much easier than going up hill.

EVERYBODY
Out together having a laugh and loving life.

FULL Suspension
Marco says there's nothing better than having 5" in the rear.

FARM LAND
Keep one eye out for cyclists while having a bit of the other!!

GRANNY Gear
Gay small gear near the pedals

Warning message of HOLE
You'd better hope for the best Because there IS a hole in the earths crust (Colin)

INNER TUBE
Carry a spare or 2 for those Pssssssssssssssssss moments. Alex can stip your bike down before you''ve had chance to get your tyre levers out. Top man!

JOYCE
The boss, Happy birthday and thank you for the party today.

KEEP left foot unclipped
To prevent a dog bite while riding through farms

LEFT turn
Lock the rear brake and hope for the best

LUBRICATION
Thanks Aoden!

MUD
Bury ones head in the mud. Alex take a step forward. Thank you for making me smile ALL weekend.

MAN DOWN
Better go back and pick thus said man up off the floor.

NUTRITION
Full English and loads of chocolate, coffee Mmmmmmm

OVERCOMPENSATION
Go with the flow. If the sun is in your eyes, shut them and hope for the best.

Warning message of POLE
Don't look down Alex, We said 'pole' not 'hole', quick look up!!!

QUEUE
Be patient, all cake comes to those who wait

ROOTS
Nothing to do with needing hair die, Keep your eyes peeled!

Unavoidable Chain SUCK
Return section of lower chain gets sucked up around Granny gear, oil it ASAP.

TYRE
Can't beat a good nobble

URANUS
Keep the shine to a minimum, use cream if necessary, Stu to advise.

VERTICALLY challenged horse.
Don't point at short horses, you could hurt their feelings.

WORKLOAD
Measured stress applied in training through the combination of frequency, intensity and duration

X-FACTOR
Style when riding and falling off

YES
This is what you say to yourself when looking at a shear downhill and Marco says go slow (Yes I will go fast)

Zzzzzz
Sleept well that night.

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I think everybody should try the off-road, leave at 8.00 next time so we can do the FULL route and still get in the cafe before the roadies.

Marco, are you still talking?

Mark Mark

[Andrew G]

5" in the rear and lubrication . Just what did you get up to on the return trip?

Would love to have come back off-road too but needed to be back and not be too knackered for today. If anyone can give a heads-up for a return off-road in future then I'll definitely be there .

[Sylv]

Very good

[Marky Mark]

[quote="Andrew G"]5" in the rear and lubrication . Just what did you get up to on the return trip?

Would love to have come back off-road too but needed to be back and not be too knackered for today. If anyone can give a heads-up for a return off-road in future then I'll definitely be there .

[Alex P]

Mark, this was spot on, hilarious...

I forgot about the pole bit.... Marco had called out earlier that he would shout out if there were any large holes ahead, Colin and I at the rear heard "hole" (or rather "pole" they do sond the same) shouted out and we were both looking down, I do not know how I missed the big steel 6" diameter post right in the middle of the track! Closely followed by Colin on my tail...

[quote]FULL Suspension
Marco says there's nothing better than having 5" in the rear.

[Amy]

Is that Alex's bike in the background - looks like it could cause a very nast accident indeed

[Marky Mark]

[quote="Amy"]Is that Alex's bike in the background - looks like it could cause a very nast accident indeed

[higg]

Thanks to everyone who turned up for the off-road ride, it made it much more enjoyable, and thanks to Joyce for the coffee at the cafe.

Sorry about the lack of notice of the return trip. It didn't really take shape until Marco pulled out his map at the cafe. (Tim was also going to do the return until he heard it went through a place called Stumblehole Farm, he took it as a warning and went back on the road.) It turned out quite a viable route similar to the out-trip, we left the cafe around 12 and got back to Coulsdon around 2.30. route was 50/50 off road/on but in terms of time was more like 75/25. Someday I'd like to experiment and try it in reverse, we might even meet the road rides on Flanchford road where the routes merge.

I'm busy for a few up coming weekends so next dates for off-road rides would be

25 Oct (maybe)
8 Nov
6 Dec
13 or 20 Dec

Or other days if anybody else remembers the route.

[Sylv]

Is there a ride tomorrow 25 Oct? Thanks

[Marky Mark]

[quote="Sylv"]Is there a ride tomorrow 25 Oct? Thanks

[higg]

Maria and myself were going to go out and reece a new route to the cafe just to see how long it would take. It would go west of the A23 rather than east like the one we've done for the last two weeks. Departure time 8.30 (8.35 on station clock) from Coulsdon. I have visitors so will probably not have tea but head straight back from the cafe.

Rough route is through Banstead wood, Kingswood and Mogador then down Colley Hill, over Reigate Heath, past Stumblehole farm to Norwood Hill and the cafe. Rough time should be about 2.5 hours but not too sure, therefore can't garauntee getting to the cafe by 11 hence the reason I haven't made an announcement before now.

Interested ?

I'll start fresh thread

[mrP(Boonen)VT]

Just great Mark

[Marky Mark]

[quote="mrP(Boonen)VT"]Just great Mark