Jens - loads of respect

[DavidKennett]

[url=http://www.bigringriding.com/]Respect[/url]

[img]http://s3.amazonaws.com/data.tumblr.com/tumblr_l5vmqdKWh31qbxnpgo1_1280.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=0RYTHV9YYQ4W5Q3HQMG2&Expires=1279823860&Signature=ZpVr%2FgZOKU6Qix2EZFoDwK3%2Fe3g%3D[/img]

[Jon H]

Blimey, that's the first time I've seen anyone riding one of those Mavic neutral service bikes. I thought they were just for show.

[Andrew G]

Top bloke in every aspect, everything he does just makes you like him more.

[George]

hes my hero!!

[Elliot M]

Also never seen any pics of anyone actually riding the Mavic bikes. Note the toeclips! NB pretty sure the bike is an old Cannondale CAAD.

[Sylv]

Must be one of these I saw in Morzine - Cannondale indeed!

[img]http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4136/4793943095_721f6f1e5c_b.jpg[/img]

[Snoop Doug]

he wants to be careful with the front skewer thingie - don't look too tight to me. I mean, I know he's hard and all.....but that's just ridiculous

[Dombo]

I think that answers the recent CW article as to who was harder, pro cyclists or, ahem, footballers.

[quote="marco"] On a more serious note I guess this is a different Voigt to the one named in the confessions of Jackshe and Kohl then?

[quote="Elliot M"]Note the toeclips!

[Andrew G]

I've been following the sport for years Marco and am far from blinkered. It is blinkered to only look at things from one angle, or for one result, I'm not the one who does that. Internet rumour is hardly the most reliable of sources, neither are riders caught doping necessarily the most reliable of witnesses. If someone can't be trusted because he rides while doping and saying he isn't, then can you trust what they say when they are caught and are trying to get a more lenient sentance?

[Paul H]

I guess whats irritating Andrew (and me) is that this is a positive topic about Voigt carry on despite his injuries and having to ride a neutral bike. Its not about some outstanding feat of endurance or doping so I dont understand why you had to spoil it and change the subject.

[Nick W]

I saw Jens talking to Phil Liggett (?) and Chris Boardman after the stage yesterday and I thought "what a great ambassador" for the sport and top bloke all round frankly.

[Dombo]

[quote="Sean Hogan"]Ermmm ahem, as the person who kicked this thread of all I wanted to do was remark on what a trooper Jens continues to be. .... He is Jens, simple as that.

[Grahame]

Blatently copied from elsewhere:




Jens Voigt doesn’t read books. He simply attacks until the books relent and tell him everything he wants to know.

Waldo can’t be found because Jens dropped him on a hill training ride… on K2.

Jens doesn’t spin or mash the pedals… he kicks them into submission.

Jens Voigt puts the “laughter” in “Manslaughter.”

Jens Voigt climbs so well for a big guy because he doesn’t actually climb hills; the hills slink into the earth in fear as they see him approach.

If you are a UCI ProTour rider and you Google “Jens Voigt,” the only result you get is “it’s not to late to take up kickball, Fred.”

Jens was a math prodigy in elementary school, putting “Attack!” in every blank space on all his tests. It would be the wrong answer for everybody else, but Jens is able to solve any problem by attacking.

Jens’ testicles are bald because hair does not grow on a mixture of titanium, brass, steel, and cold, hard granite.

Eddy Merckx was actually a neo-pro at the same time as Jens, but Jens dropped him so hard that he shot backwards in time to the 1960′s, where he became a great champion.

Jens once had a heart attack on the Tourmalet. Jens counterattacked repeatedly until he kicked its ass.

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick… and Jens still drove him to quit racing bikes and become an ice dancing commentator on Lifetime.

If Jens Voigt was a country, his principle exports would be Pain, Suffering, and Agony.

If Jens Voigt was a planet, he’d be the World of Hurt.

Jens Voigt doesn’t know where you live, but he knows exactly where you will die.

Jens Voigt doesn’t have a shadow because he dropped it repeatedly until it retired, climbing into the CSC team car and claiming a stomach ailment.

Jens Voigt once challenged Lance Armstrong to a “who has more testicles” contest. Jens won… by five.

When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jens Voigt jumps out and attacks.

You are what you eat. Jens Voigt eats spring steel for breakfast, fire for lunch, and a mixture of titanium and carbon fiber for dinner. For between-meal snacks he eats men’s souls, and downs it with a tall cool glass of The Milk of Human Suffering.

Jens Voigt believes it’s not butter.

Jens Voigt can eat just one.

The first time man split the atom was when the atom tried to hold Jens Voigt’s wheel, but cracked.

Jens Voigt doesn’t complain about what suffering does to him… but suffering constantly complains about getting picked on by Jens Voigt.

Jens Voigt can start a fire by rubbing two mud puddles together.

Guns kill a couple dozen people every day. Jens Voigt kills 150.

Jens’s tears are so tough they could be the world heavyweight mixed-martial arts champion. Too bad Jens never cries.

Jens Voigt rides so fast during attacks, that he could circle the globe, hold his own wheel, and ride in his own draft. At least as long as he didn’t try to drop himself.

Jens Voigt nullified the periodic table because he doesn’t believe in any element, other than the element of surprise.

The grass is always greener on the other side. Unless Jens Voigt has been riding on the other side in which case it’s white with the salty, dried tears of all the riders whose souls he has crushed.

[Nick W]

Is he The Stig?

We should be told.