What's the best clean joke ever?

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Postby adrian » Thu Jul 05, 2007 11:14 am

Two television aerials got married. The wedding was brilliant, but the reception was terrible.
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Postby Elliot M » Thu Jul 05, 2007 11:16 am

[quote="Jon Hemming"]Arial and Verdana walk into a bar.

The barman says "We don't serve your type here".


that is my favourite joke, unfortunately people (non graphic designers) don't tend to get it as they don't understand "type" in this context:?

--

a man walks into a bar with a piece of green tarmac

barman says "i told that pyschopath he's barred!"
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Postby Elliot M » Thu Jul 05, 2007 11:22 am

police are on the lookout for an escaped bacon slicer, last spotted at the nudist camp. the inspector said he's had a tip off, but should be back in work by the morning.

there are 2 kinds of people in this world, those who understand binary.. hang on, that's not right...
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Postby adrian » Thu Jul 05, 2007 11:28 am

Man goes to the doctor's with a bit of lettuce hanging out of his a*se.

Doctor: "That looks painful."
Patient: "That's just the tip of the iceberg".
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Postby mrP(Boonen)VT » Thu Jul 05, 2007 11:51 am

Jon, that was quite good, and Adrian's (wedding) made me laugh.

OK then...

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
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Postby Jon H » Thu Jul 05, 2007 12:46 pm

Daring thieves broke into Scotland Yard last night and stole all the toilet seats. Asked for a statement, a Police spokesman said they have nothing to go on.
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Postby mrP(Boonen)VT » Thu Jul 05, 2007 12:46 pm

How about......


Two blondes walk into a building..........you'd think at least one of them would have seen it. :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby mrP(Boonen)VT » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:00 pm

How about.....

Two ladies standing on a street corner.

One says to the other, "Have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?"

The other replies, "No, but I've been swung around by the b*oobs!"
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Postby adrian » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:08 pm

That reminds me:

David Blunkett goes into Mappin & Webb and starts swinging his dog around above his head. Somewhat alarmed, the manager approaches and gives a discreet cough.

"Good afternoon, Mr Blunkett. Is there anything I can help you with?"

"No, thanks - I'm just having a look around."
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Postby mrP(Boonen)VT » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:20 pm

Adrian - top dollar....

I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle. :wink:
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Postby adrian » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:28 pm

What's the difference between a street trader and a dachshund?

One bawls out his wares on the pavement...
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Postby mrP(Boonen)VT » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:32 pm

I bought some HP sauce the other day.

It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years. :wink:
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Postby adrian » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:37 pm

I'm struggling to keep up here - it's just like being on the bike! :wink:

Did you hear about the bloke who drowned in a bowl of muesli? He got dragged under by the currant.
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Postby Andrew G » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:45 pm

I think we've found our cabaret for the Annual Dinner. :D
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Postby Dombo » Thu Jul 05, 2007 1:53 pm

[quote="seanieh.NearlyNewCondor©"][quote]He says, "Are you a pole vaulter?"


Andrew, disappointed in you. That should be Polish vaulter. Tut, tut. ;-)


No, just a missing comma.
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